nope i'm not happy. i have issues...with certain things and people. (who am i kidding). things just haven't gone smoothly (not like they often do).

there are too many things i'm not thinking about...and too many things i am thinking about. but we (my brain and i) are getting the priorities mixed up. too many things i should get but simply don't.

then i see people (emphasis placed on "people" i.e. plural) around me who are working harder than they say they are (not that they shouldn't...but that's beside the point) and what's worse is when they simply deny (or maybe don't realise) that they are...sometimes it's not the circumstances or the facts that make me unhappy, but how the things are done/presented/whatever...

the CE people are a fun bunch. but i have this sense of foreboding that i shouldn't expect too much. probably just attend meetings, have fun, do enough...from the way things look right now, the "putting in extra" part will probably not come in. don't know what this reflects of me...but it's one of the least of my concerns. i have other things to worry about.

--betcha no one gets me.

nothing's holding up. wonder if this is the so called stress everyone experiences. aiyah...i doubt so. but i just hope that i'll meet someone i can talk to soon...unload before i go nuts. haha...

really wished SL was around with me for today's material science lecture. the prof said so many funny things (i.e. the stuff that only the both of us would get) but then, i couldn't talk to anyone about it. cos they'd either not get it, or get it only after much explanation (which totally kills the fun) and then say i'm sick (not literally but you know...). oh well...

went to j8 after school today. the entire place was crawling with students doing last minute shopping for we-know-what-event. seesh. i intended to walk around but gave up so just bought my lunch and left. parking cost me slightly less than a dollar which is alright. i was and still am considering buying the file/folder/whatever you call it from OP. well, 'son has the ripcurl one which i think is VERY NICE but it's gone out of stock. grrr. i want one of those files cos somehow i don't like plastic files anymore. and i can just carry that to school with my pen(s) in it. yes even if i'm lazy i don't intend to let others know too easily. heh.

ok quite looking forward to tomorrow, cos there's someone accompanying me to school and i have a lunch mate. yay...oh speaking of whom, wonder how's my 'bus mate' doing -- haven't seen him in a while...yeah maybe i'll drop him an sms tomorrow...

anyways, this is a nice song...the lyrics are quite interestingly somehow...relevant (?)

Song of the Moment: 3 Doors Down - Here By Me

I hope you’re doing fine out there without me
'Cause I'm not doing so good without you
The things I thought you'd never know about me
Were the things I guess you always understood
So how could I have been so blind for all these years
I guess I only see the truth through all this fear of living without
you

And everything I have in this world
And all that I'll ever beIt could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me
I can’t take another day without you
'Cause, baby, I could never make it on my own
I've been waiting so long just to hold you
And to be back in your arms where I belong
I'm sorry I can't always find the words to say
But everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love

And everything I have in this world
All that I'll ever beIt could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me

edit
so guitar rawked once again (not surprising anymore). the class is getting more lively with every week (yay!)...today we intentionally dao-ed D.Chai...he was saying "have we done this?"...we gave him the "huh..." look then he repeated himself a couple of times. i think he got quite sian-ed and went "have we done-ded this?" and then we went "huh? done-ded?" and he said "what do i have to say to get you guys to answer me man..."

oh and i suspect he likes the sound of the E-chord on his amps. haha...weirdo. he keeps playing that chord of all chords...and keeps going *jang jang jang* trying to make it sound nicer (when the same chord sounds the same)...the piece (some exam piece) we played today was nice...but i think my class still needs to catch up on the barring technique. can understand what they're doing cos i took super long to master the skill too.

ok, i'm in need (make that desperate need) for inspiration...back when SL was here (which wasn't too long ago) i had someone to share present with...now aiyah...headache headache...


just finished washing my car. feel so worn out. the weather was totally WARM. supposed to come back in to cool down, then maybe do some reading...but at this rate, i doubt i'll get anything done. instead i feel like taking a nap. i haven't taking my medicine yet. uh-oh ok so i better go now. think i'll update again after guitar -- if there's anything blog-worthy that is...

edit
just came back from jem's place. ok not jem's place but the hospital. my eye is giving me problems. i think the whole eyeball may just roll out. it has been going on for a couple of days already (say 3 days) but i only went to visit uncle doc just now, cos the pain got quite unbearable...or rather, unocomfortable.

the uncle doc was quite funny. he asked me what i was studying in uni so i told him mech engin, he said "oh, so next time u have to climb up those long narrow staircases to check those water fixtures etc how?" haha i got a bit worried there...but i told him "will worry about it when the time comes..." i never thought i'd get a job like that. but oh wells, we'll see.

justin was extremely hyper today, he kept running around and talking. jem sat in my car for a ride home and he was saying about how his father drove better than me (there's something about this kid that i have an issue about but shall not mention further). and justin's maths is really great. he's 5 and he can do addition and subtraction like at primary 3 level! gosh...kids these days...

i'm starting to like lab lessons in uni. why? cos we don't have to draw tables and plot graphs anymore! haha...yes, that bit of laziness in me still hasn't disappeared.

don't ask me why i mention lab practicals suddenly. i ain't too sure myself.

nothing much up today, in fact, i woke up and decided to go back to sleep cos i was way too tired (for no apparent reason). and i woke up at 2+pm to go have my lunch. and now i'm back here wondering what i should do next. thoughts of doing some constructive work have been appearing and then disappearing in my brain (wonder why).

i know i'll be having dinner at some restaurant later, but i'm not sure where...cos it's jem's birthday and i think i'm driving there. must remember to drive more cautiously...cos i'm going with my parents. hehe...

ok will be back to update later. (i just managed to kill 3 minutes of my time).

did a lot of stuff in a single day. at least i didn't waste much time today. but i'm really really tired.

woke up and sent the car for servicing. yo must say that the toyota svc centre was cool...there was net connection and computers for customers to use, so i just spent a lot of time playing pinball...and i read today's newspapers (both english and chinese) and had loads of free drinks (too bad they only had hot drinks...and no coke). i waited 2 hours for my car...actually it was supposed to be 1.5 hours, but somehow the guys had forgotten to wash my car so i had to wait longer.

after that i came back and bought carpark coupons cos my supply is running out. now i have new stock stored in my car. no fear of getting another fine. then went for my long-overdue haircut and then bought lunch in one major hurry. haha...i literally ran home, put lunch on my table, turned on the fan to the max directly at my makan and went to take a bath before coming up and finishing up my meal. then went to put all the stuff back into my car (cos servicing must take out everything). after which i zoom-ed off to school for tutorials.

and that's exacly how the entire day passed...seesh, i think this lifestyle would be too hectic for me if it became an everyday thing. haha...

two people have asked me if i was sick in two continuous days. (not good). they say i look sick. and although i don't really feel sick, i'm starting to wonder if i'm feeling alright.

i'm falling behind in my work, but at the moment i'm not doing anything about it. it's almost half the semester now (wow, that was fast) and hopefully i will not fall behind too much in what's left of this sem...

i've reached my mileage of 900+ km and i still have not reached the 1000 km mark. how am i going for servicing tomorrow? seesh. but what can i do...i have lousy estimation skills i guess. i kenah-ed booked again today. another fine for me...though i'm really not feeling fine at all. it was all cos i went into the bus lane. i feel it was a justified move, but who am i to say anything...i don't work for the traffic police. when i saw the traffic police woman taking down people's vehicle numbers, i couldn't decide if i should kick her or kick myself. sighs.

i was in the lane cos i was about to filter left at the turning coming ahead and given the heavy traffic, i was worried i couldn't cut into the lane later (further down the road, nearer to the filter lane). so i went in just after the bus stop...after letting the bus come out of the bay and in front of me (cos afterall it was rightfully a bus lane). and a few metres ahead, there she was...and i knew i was in trouble. argh. the law is the law...i believe i saw her hesitating and contemplating on whether i should be booked, but i am quite sure i was. ARGH. how fustrating...demerit points come free with this by the way. i don't blame her for anything...cos the law is the law and by right (left) she had to book me...but GRRrrr...i'm screwed!!! i can't afford any stupid demerit points~...

next time i'm not taking chances, at the most i'll just not make the turning. sianz...

i'm just simply killing time right now, preparing for the cross-island drive (wonder how many more times i'm gonna do this for the same person)...trying to finish up my mileage as well. so it's killing two birds with one stone...or so i try to convince myself. i'm going to pick up tong shou and R from AMK then go to the airport to send SL off. after that i'll send them home and then go home for a short 'break' before going off to school again. end to end PIE travelling today. yeah. i'll report if there are any holes on the road later. haha. oh and JH is supposed to go, but she is apprarently too 'busy' with...ah-hem. ok shall not go on suan-ing her.

actually i feel like taking a short nap before i need to set off. but i'm afraid i'll oversleep. sighs. 1.5 hours more to go...someone please entertain me...

to all my friends who are suffering from insomnia. i have an absolute cure. go attend my material science lecture -- i think the online recording will do just fine. gosh.

i skipped lessons today (hope we-know-who-2 isn't gonna see this). cos i was having a fever in the morning. lousy excuses i come up with. but i still went for EC, and i'm glad i did cos i may have ended up group-less for the group project if i hadn't. phew~...my group is cool, we're the NY group...my fellow JC mates -- 2 batches before me.

went back to SN again, to return the materials borrowed and give my take on the manual...so we were having a mini-conference where i was the person running the show. with the pres, VP, PA head and ASC. well...until mrsS joined us. the training seems to be getting more systematic (which is a good thing) but personally i don't like the incorporation/merger (or whatever you call it) of the other 'related' CCAs. i don't really (don't want to) see the relation. to me, i feel it affects the morale of the club. but then, from a more personal perspective...M.I.T.S. and library aren't bad CCAs to work with...for various reasons.

at first i had no intention of talking to any teachers today. no intention of letting anyone know i was back other than those who needed to know. cos i wasn't planning to stay long anyway. but when mrsS came in, i know i could just dash the thought. at first it went pretty well and i grew a bit optimistic...but after we finished up the discussion, she moved onto the discussion of what they should be doing for teachers' day with the pres and VP. then cos she had moved to the subject of 'teachers', she suddenly made the statement of "nearly all the teachers are still in the staff room..." and then i think cos she saw me flashing the worried/please-don't-sabo-me look, she said "oh mrsK is still there too...you must come up with me". *bish~!*

in the end, i didn't have much of a choice cos i was helping her move the fish tanks from the specs to her car. and had to go to the SR to get keys with my juniors. but the weird thing was i didn't see her when i went to the SR (huge sigh of relief). after moving the stuff, i wanted to go have lunch in the canteen so walked in again...but there wasn't any food left (it was around 5pm). so just left...intending to take the fam lounge route. that was when i saw her. haha...funny.

she asked me how uni life was going...i said ok. (actually if i still don't do anything about it, i'll be lagging very far behind). haha everyone seems to be eagerly asking me whether i drove today...she said should have told her earlier that i was driving then i could have fetched her home. haha anyway explained she was kinda rushing off to pick her son up. great time to recharge...need the energy to play catch-up.

and yes i have hereby reached the conclusion. i didn't not want to see her, but i didn't want to see her with mrsS around =X

whoa...and i thought this hectic lifestyle would come to an end this week. things don't look that way anymore.

today drawing lesson was ok. the prof was lame. haha...we were supposed to see this star from a given picture of coloured (black and white) shapes (mainly triangles). so i thought it was a "answer-immediately" type of question and i said "yes found it." the moment i found it. how was i supposed to know that he was going to give the class time to slowly look for it. so paiseh!!!

had guitar after school. i skipped econs lecture today but came home and read my own notes instead (boy, i sure hope a particular someone isn't reading this...) so i came back, had a break, surfed the net for like 15 minutes and then went to read text. i can tell you that econs hasn't grown any more interesting than when since i last studied it. (eeeew...)

but...GUITAR WAS COOL! haha...we played some song from the text, but it was rocking. and we did the rock 'n roll rift as a class without the background music. and it sounded great~!

haha...at the end of the song, there's this progressing note thing followed by a strumming of the A7 chord. everytime we ended the song, he would strum the A7 once, then repeatedly...then he did the action of smashing his guitar. -_-"

then later, he was teaching us the A power chord and taught us by showing us the E chord first. so he was strumming the E chord and standing in front of his amp going "hey, this sounds cool!" *strum strum strum* -- i simply don't get it sometimes, but in this case, it really did sound KINDA cool.

then cos my amp sounded a little "dark" today (oh, "dark" means bassy) so we were both meddling with the thing, but we just couldn't cut the bass. weird amp...i had to lower BASS AND MID to zero (near zero) before it started sounding anything near decent...and D.Chai laughing (very funny meh?). then he asked me if i liked it dark...i was like "NO WAY..." then he said "too bad." -- ah well let everyone just suan me...it's fun!

tomorrow, i'm gonna give ST a lift to toa payoh for some CE matters, then have to make my way back to see my junior (the present PA head) and ASC regarding the AV instruction manual "thingy thing" (as said by 'son).

i know there's something up on wednesday but suddenly can't recall what (darn this lousy memory of mine). thursday we're going to the airport. friday got to send my car for servicing. why do i have this feeling it's gonna be a long week???

actually i am too tired to blog today. but i decided to in the end cos i really had quite a day.

went back to campus for concert engineers firmiliarisation today. it was alright, we didn't do much -- just set up 3 systems and tested them...in between we did funny things like how JY asked us to take photo...

haha this was what we took at nanyang house...of course there are more but i won't flood my blog with pics. i really must say everyone in CE is so fun...i think i'm going to have a nice time in this CCA...hopefully i can learn more stuff. after we finished checking the equipment, we went can2 for makan...i think WJ had a fun time laughing R, while we were eating. cos she was the last to finish...not my fault that she ate so slowly...oh did i mention? WJ is a fellow lefty. yipieee~

after that we went down to town to meet serena and SL. i parked at toa payoh cos i really really didn't want to drive to town and parking there's extremely expensive. so we (me and R) arrived there early. val couldn't come anymore so we simply hung around the area -- it's been so long since we visited town anyway...killed quite some time walking from orchard MRT to wisma to taka to heeren and then to cini and back to taka again to meet serena.

later i drove my car down to PS (cos we had decided to meet there instead) since their (serena's and SL's) class had arranged to have a farewell gathering at dhoby ghaut. i was caught in this jam at buyong road. #$^&%#...and it was so hard to find a parking lot at PS. ok...so it wasn't that hard, but i had to wait for one...how stressful. i mean, i can't even be sure that i would be able to park nicely and i have to worry about even getting a lot.

anyways, tong shou joined us there and the few of us had dinner at swensens and after that we had ice-cream too *drools*. we took a couple of photos...

time really passes so quickly...sighs.

ok i really got to go sleep before i literally K.O. in front of my computer. will continue tomorrow (or something)...

went back to SN today. didn't do much. but it was ok...had no intention to do much in the first place. cos of this wonderful timing, i'm still deliberating if i should go back for teachers' day. kind of too near...but i will have an excuse if i decide to. how convenient.

went to town to pick SL up. i don't like driving in town cos it's so stressful, everyone else is so pro but me. anyway with much effort i still managed to bring the both of us safely to SN safely. haha...must be really traumatising sitting in my car...

i think SL should be very satisfied with today's visit back since she managed to see everyone she wanted to see. apparently the great news of her going to H______ has spread to the entire SN staff room. hehe...thanks to "we-know-who" (or at least i think it's her...) as for me, it was alright i guess...just that the point about my lack of yuan2 fen4 with "we-know-who-2" has been further proven...hehehe. "out of how many days in a year, i come back on a day when she's on MC" haha...quite hiliarious in a way. "we-know-who" was complaining to me that she had called "we-know-who-2" several times but she just refused to answer her phone or reply any smses. so the both of us were trying to call "we-know-who-2"...but i didn't manage to get her to answer either.

i managed to drop by the AV store and talk to ASC...gonna help out with the editing of AV manuals. cos of some change in CCA system blah blah so now they've gotta train other non-AV members like those from mits and library. i think i should be alright doing this stuff, since it's just editing and probably helping them write an introduction section. "always glad to be of service..."

and i ended up going to school for that miserable 1-hour econs tutorial. personally i think it was not worth the cost of my petrol there. but then luckily i went because we-know-who-2 later sms-ed me asking what happend (cos of my missed calls) and when i told her we went back and i didn't see her, she asked if i had classes. thankfully i didn't skip class today or i wouldn't be able to answer that question. *phew~*...looks like someone has a sore throat and the likes...exactly what i have partially recovered from...interesting...

anyways, got CE firmiliarisation session tomorrow. sianZzzzZzz...but what to do? off to ZzzzZzz...

had duty again today. wow...it kind of feels great being back behind the mixer. my fellow sound engineers are cool funky people...oh did i mention whacky? haha...we were just laming away and killing time so time really flew while we were there. while i was there, there was a band performing...didn't really notice who they were - just knew they were playing. then suddenly, charles mentioned that those guys were part of some band [insert name here (of which i can't remember cos of my failing memory)] and i realised that they were the peeps from last year's rock concert and the previous year's palooza. so LWF was there...together with the other tutor/ex-tutor(not sure which is correct). so anyways, i got to know LWF cos i worked the audio for palooza and we did it quite successfully. so he was quite surprised to see me behind the mixer here too. haha...should have seen the look on his face while he was playing on stage and i sudddenly intentionally stood in front of him.

hmm according to SL (if i didn't hear her wrong), she posted a comment for some of the previous entry. sad to say, i don't see it. wonder why...but i tested the thing and it's working fine...weird. SL if you're here again and reading this, maybe you want to comment and try again. if not just use the tagboard. seesh...wonder what's wrong.

i'm kind of feeling 'guilty' for having a car and driving. ok, so maybe not exactly 'guilty', but somewhat. i just don't really like it when people think i'm freaking rich cos i drive. it puts pressure and yada yada yada...then again i'd rather not elaborate. somehow there's this pressure aspect that i haven't told anyone about. so maybe not now. but it's definitely not the 'pressure' dealt with in physics.

gonna quit being lame and get out of here. gotta figure out how to get to town without getting lost. yikez.

did my first duty as a concert engineer yesterday. ok make that first OFFICIAL duty as a concert engineer. the position i'm holding is "sound engineer". on the whole, i feel this club is more professional relative to those i've been in. and there are some aspects of this particular club that i would like SNAV to learn. but then again, different associations, different practices, different working situations etc. but we'll see...

my lousy memory seems to be getting worse. already can't remember people's names but now it seems to be more severe. grrs. hope i don't malu-ate myself too badly anytime soon...

went over to mrsT's place. had to wait for her to get some stuff done so i helped her arrange her white board. haha...cos it dropped on the floor. but since i'm a messy person myself, i didn't do much except make everything not crumpled and get crumpled. haha...

ok, i'm going to prepare for going to school. oh man...hope there's no jam.

what a lousy day. but well, it didn't hit me that hard till i reached home. got my very first parking ticket today. why? cos i haven't switched to "driver's metality" yet...and displaying carpark coupons aren't part of my mental what-to-do-after-parking list. sighs. 30 bucks. bummers...i'm currently already broke enough.

but that's nothing. i'm sick once again. the same old problem just wish i could diagnose it. and i do wonder if it's psychological sometimes. or then again, maybe the psychological aspect just plays a part in making things worse for me.

things have just been lousy...don't ask why. yes i know i can be "insensitive" and "troublesome" (regardless of whether it's intentional/unintentional). and i don't give a crap because certain people just know how to push the right buttons to piss me off but most of the time, i just tolerate cos it's probably not worth it. i don't write this sort of thing about anyone else in something that will be read by another and be remembered. ah whatever. i'm tired enough so let's not brood on this.

it's not going to be long before i start wanting to be all by myself again. things just haven't been smooth lately despite the fact i keep trying not to take negative viewpoints...sighs.

am i lucky or am i lucky? haha...no more getting up before the sun rises, no more taking the freezing bus, no more queuing up in the mad queue at boon lay...yup i'm so lucky.

first day driving to school was alright on the whole...there was a massive jam on the PIE all the way to clementi. seesh~ one thing about jams on the expressway, they're quite absurd whereby once we pass the jam site, the traffic is so unbelievably clear! lucky i had JH with me to entertain me and i didn't have to school alone. i couldn't find the carpark that was supposed to be 'near' my school, so i had no choice but to walk all the way down the long corridor from south to north spine. madness. and ran into drawing lesson just as it began. yikes.

ok, drawing lesson was ok. other than the fact that i was going dizzy from all the working lines crossing from left to right and right to left. grrrs. drawing isn't too bad, maybe if i was more awake. after all, hello, drawing at 8:30am in the morning is totally no joke. considering the amount of patience it takes. ah well...

learnt nash's game theory at econs lecture today. ok at half of econs lecture today. the other half went to imperfect competition (zzz...zzz...). after lecture, R hopped along with me to PS cos i had guitar after that. so went there, walked around, had dinner and went guitar while R went home.

guitar was rawkin' today man! haha D.chai brought in his pedal board and taught us the technicalities of jamming with the board. woah, the dude has a cool guitar man...or rather the one he brought today was cool. apprently it's his favourite and he has many guitars at home...and a recording studio *gasp*. although we didn't jam much today (maybe like about 20 minutes), i think i learnt quite a lot, not just in the area of e.guitar, but also in the audio engin aspect. it really amazes me how my e.guitar, audio engin and physics link up. *cool bananas*...anyways, i think the class is shrinking *yay!* that means we can jam louder. haha and from today i've seen a new side of our class...wonder how many times the word sh*t was said...hehe ok i'm just being boh liao. *grinz* (oops, must remember to pay up the loan shark notice don't wanna get thrown out of lessons...)

i had to drive home myself...i kind of like driving alone. ultimately peaceful, cos there's no one in the car screaming directions at me or critising my driving etc. but it's stress because since there's no one talking to me i tend to be more aware of the pressure involved. whoever said driving was a stressful experience wasn't lying.

ok, off to sleep. ZzzzZzzz...

there are several ways to do the very same thing. like for maths, we can do a question the hard way, or by sheer brute force. then again, who am i to comment about doing maths. seesh.

anyways, i was having thoughts that were totally out of context during tutorials today. ok, so maybe not totally out of context but the mind does weird things. our maths tutor was on sick leave today, so we had a substitute. she's really great, cos she taught us in so much detail and explained so much stuff which we were denied from learning the last tutorial. but halfway through class, while she was going through complex numbers/polar, she was saying "euler's formula" but she prounounced it as "oil-er's formula"...which brought strange thoughts to my mind...

if you were a scientist/mathematician and had a complicated name, like "euler", i wouldn't name a formula/ law/ theory after myself...cos everyone would be using the formula and a lot would probably pronounce the name wrong. hehe. but then again...the term "famous scientist/mathematician" does not come anywhere within my scope somehow eh?

ok, i'm off to watch tv...haha nothing better to do. looking forward to tomorrow. *whistle whistle*

there has to be a balance between practicality and theory. and although you need to know your stuff, you need to be realistic as well. that's the message that has kept popping up in my brain over the past week or so. sigh, i don't think i'll elaborate any further. i'm really way way too lazy.

went for concert engineers meeting wednesday night. must say everyone's really friendly. other than the realistic-unrealistic issue that hit me, i think it was quite a fun night. the seniors are nice and everyone got along.

i don't believe i'm stupid. but what am i talking about? ah never mind. it's just a reminder to myself.

WTF...think i got hit by spyware AGAIN. why do these things keep happening, and it always goes to the stupid extent i have to keep reformatting my com. sighs. my IE's all screwed, can blog but can't access my blog and other blogspot sites. darn. i don't have the time to reformat my com again you know? stupid spyware, go away lah...go spy on someone else. grrs. i'm going to take my time to reformat. i need time to back up my stuff first. how troublesome...

hmm let's see it felt like a friday yesterday since today's national day and all. but aiyah, it's just deception...it's TUESDAY today. i must remind myself. but then, yesterday's lab lesson was cool! we went to use the instron machines in the lab.

what we did was to study the stress/ strain/ elasticity of different materials. but to put it simply, we were just breaking stuff in the lab. using the instron machine to pull the materials apart. even steel and aluminium specimens were destroyed...*evil laugh*. but the lab techie was on just one funny dude. kept saying lame stuff and giving us useless information. but it made the whole experience more interesting i guess. the tutor was pretty clear too...compared to the previous week. so i learnt more stuff yesterday...

after lab, some of my TG people set up an 'ambush' along the corridors outside the lab. everyone who approached (including myself) did so with caution but were still caught and we went for lunch together. generally the people in my TG are friendly. a few are wacky...the rest are sane. haha...seriously they're great. maybe it'll take some time for us to bond but so far it's been ok cos everyone's friendly (and talkative?) hmm...ok maybe everyone but me. there was this crazy malaysian guy who totally can't speak a word of mandrin though he's chinese. then the indian scholar was showing us some indian dance thingy - he offered to teach us indian dance. erm...never mind that.

i also ran into ms justina tan at NIE...we went over to buy plastic cover for our textbooks cos popular had ran out of stock. she has a really great memory...i can't even remember when she taught me but she can. wow...i'm impressed. she told us to jio her when we have lunch at canteen A. we'll see i guess, but i don't see why not. so interesting who we meet at school.

ok i'm going off now. tomorrow school till 9:30pm...*i-will-survive~!* got concert engineers meeting. yuppers...back to my AV roots for me...the sound engineer!
HAPPY NATIONAL DAY EVERYONE!

woah it's been a long time since i actually fell asleep while doing tutorials. haven't had that kind of load in a while. oh wells...at least i'm awake now. i was nodding all over my polar-cartesian graph. it's amazing what kind of patterns you can produce from different equations. but i can tell you the process is super tedious. gosh...what am i talking about.

had the intention of going to watch fireworks. actually i wanted to go to the carnival@marina thingy but when i read that you had to take a public bus into the place, i figured i didn't want to have to squeeze with a gazillion people onto those buses to get into and out of the place...i've had enough of that in school these few days. anyway, i didn't go to watch fireworks in the end cos i was too tired. come on, after 2 tuition sessions i'm really in no energy level to do anything (i sound like some electron).

sigh think the school work is getting to my brains. i kinda enjoy it, but must keep in mind that i must not be obsessed with it. i think what XW says has a point...studying/mugging is one thing, having a life is another...it's probably a slightly different case with those who have come to study from overseas. somehow, when i look at it, it seems they have lesser distractions: no necessity to set aside time to spend with family and friends...just they tend to have somewhat less of a social life, other than within the school. so it's probably good to go overseas for a period of time to study, but it'd probably get really lonely...as for us, we have other things to bother about beside school, so it's not surprising we don't 'mug' as hard as they do...unless we really want to.

no, it's not that i want to console myself for not studying hard, i must remember to have my life...cos i'm looking at some people who have evolved into something they weren't. i believe there's a fine line between studying hard and being a mugger. but who am i to tell others how hard they should/shouldn't study/mug?

hmm...actually the difference i'm noticing about my uni life is i'm somehow more of 'enjoying' what i'm studying rather than 'studying-for-the-sake-of-studying'. so doing tutorials, no matter how tiring is actually not that much of a torture on the whole (other than for the tedious parts). so is attending tutorial sessions, it's not much of a torture, now esp since it's a free-and-easy thing and you can choose not to attend both lectures and tutorials. let's just hope it stays this way...

i signed up for laughlin lecture (think it's on q.mech). i'm under the impression (and i think it's true) it's rare to actually get the chance to attend a lecture by a nobel prize winner, so i'm gonna make the most of it (haha...reminds me of how mrL challeneged me to win a nobel prize one day)...considering going for the paul davies one too. but it's in NUS...kind of out of the way. guess we'll see...

so not looking forward to tomorrow - or make that the rest of today...got to go give tuition straight after school. wonder if i'll even make it through the part in school alive don't talk about at tuition. sighs.

today was MAE day...haha there was this queue above canteen A, cos they were giving out free goodie bags and t-shirts. so i decided to just boh liao and join in cos it was lunch time and i wasn't hungry anyway. glad i did, cos the shirt's very nice!!! at first i thought it was rather small and was quite sad, then i realised it was actually ok...heh! so happy *grins* the goodie bag was filled with stuff lah...erm just "stuff" like coffeemate, sweets, biscuits and magazines. but it was a pretty good deal, considering that i didn't have to queue long...

met my TG today...well, part of it some of whom i've already met on monday. DP the chinese scholar's really friendly and has a real good memory...felt so bad when i couldn't remember her name but she could remember mine. gosh, i can't remember the name of the other guy. darn my memory sucks! and i think some of them have mistaken me for a guy once again. arh...whatever man...just hope nothing stupid happens within the next couple of days...or make that the rest of the time we'll be together...

received an e-mail telling me that i got shortlisted for LDP...some part of me just wants to sign up to have a try...after all i have nothing to lose...rite? LDP is leadership development programme...put simply, if you enter the programme, it's supposed to be prestigious and you're supposed to be an ambassador of the school...and of course, it'll look good on your resume in the future...and yada yada. the thing is, you have to go through an interview (which means formal clothing *yucks!*) and then if you really get in, you'll be sent of OBS (NOOoooo!!!). but the perks are there though, high probability of being sent overseas on student exchanges (or so i think...). ok, basically i really do hope to go for a 6 month overseas exchange programme sometime while i persue my degree...but then, i don't want to go for OBS and the hassle of an interview. aiyah think it's nearly impossible lah. we shall see i guess...

actually i'm having a slight headache now. terrible.

met my ECom class today. majority of whom are guys once again...but there're a couple of interesting people...one girl from iran, a whole bunch of chinese scholars and an indian scholar. fun people...esp my groupmates...william, gerald and another guy whose name i can't remember. the whole bunch of them were from the same class (i.e. i was the only odd one out) but these guys still made everything better. ok, in fact, apart from this one guy who was terribly pessimistic, cynical (and shall i say weird...) the entire class was real nice. everyone was just having fun...hope my tutorial group would be just as nutty.

anyways i told my groupmates that i have a horrible memory and if i saw them around campus tomorrow, it would be so possible that i couldn't recognise them...and true enough now i can't remember the dude's name. gosh.

hmm...one thing i noticed is how industry-based my course is...i hear the phrase "next time, when you guys become engineers..." very often. it's like everything we do is in preparation for our future profession and we're told how we're supposed to apply this stuff in the industry. cool...like this kind of learning.

i survived another day of lessons. basically it was 2 hours of lecture...i kind of fell asleep in material science but oh wells. physics was alright, though i want to ensure i understand the 'gully-lay-lyan' equations (hehe...) and 2 hours Ecom tutorial. i know i'm mean but i really think my physics lecturer has a funny accent...he pronounces some words 'differently' but come to think of it, i find it makes him sound brilliant (like those super great physicists who pronounce specific terms funny) that's why i imitate him...maybe i can learn to talk like him.

ok, i have 3 lectures tomorrow and then it's mentor-meeting. wonder what time it'll all end tomorrow...

so tired. school was alright today, i survived the longest day of the week. anyways, i was late for school today...how sucky right? well, the bus queue for 179 stretched all the way to boon lay mrt. darn, i got to the bus interchange late cos of the stupid 157...the bus route was jammed 3/4 of the way.

lab lesson today was shocking! i attended a lesson totally without knowing what was going on. ok so maybe i didn't totally NOT understand it but then i didn't understand 85-90% of what was going on. why? cos it was a material science lab lesson! grrrrr~ we were supposed to study the microscopic structure of materials. describe the grain boundaries etc...the defects, the precipitate (which i still have totoally no idea what the heck it is)...for alloys with carbon composition there's still the pearlites and ferlites or something. i really don't know what i'm talking about anyway, just noting down some of the terms i used...or tried to use. erm...only thing i think i figured out was that if the structure has no clearly defined grain boundaries, then it's amphorous...or something like that. hope things don't go on like this...it's so scarily overwhelming!

i met part of my tutorial group today. so many scholars...from all the asean countries, china and india. yahooo~ the india scholar was so power at lab today. gosh! he literally sounded inhuman, talking to our lab mentor (he told us not to call him "tutor" or "teacher") so anyways, smart-ness aside, the guys in my class seem pretty friendly. worked with a few in lab today and made friends with a couple of others in the lift while we left the lab. cool people...

i bought the MAE jacket today, investment to wear on the bus to school and save myself from shivering all the way there. MAE week, i think there'll be some competition involving JCs tomorrow since i have a 2 hour break, i'll be going to check it out...afterall, there's free rotiboy giveaway!

as for the rest of the lessons, they were all lectures...and after the last lecture, i had just enough time to make it to PS for e.guitar...no time for dinner though, sort of reached there 10-15 minutes early. lesson was ok today, general revision of previous lessons, D.chai said he'd look for a couple of songs for us to jam next lesson. looking forward to that, but in the meantime, next week will be a holiday. so sad.

ok off to take a break, not that i'm VERY tired, just tired. will be watching TV i think. need to unload my brain.

was at home sleeping the entire day. ok...ALMOST the entire day. until the girl from campus crusade called me. yes, i have intentions to join CCC but i'm really not sure yet. probably just waiting for them to convince me. there are loads of things i want to do, but cos i have other stuff it all seems so hard to fit in. the more i think about these things, the more i want to give some things up.

i still have my marking to do from yesterday's lesson. but i spent today doing nothing. drove out to pump air for the car tyres and went for a car wash. kind of firmiliarised myself with both processes. must careful esp for the carwash bit. cos it was a manual carwash so when i moved forward i had to be careful. my father kept reminding me that the guys washing the car still wanted their feet. but that aside, i think i mounted the kerb while making a turning at the carwash line. oops...so paisehs.

with my laserprinter, i now have better means to get my notes printed and more efficiently. but i have yet to come down to getting my tutorials done. still trying to motivate myself. grrs.

went to TP just now. saw mrsT's car there but didn't see her. had the coffee bread outside the food court and then went to the NTUC to buy stuff. had the intention to go to the foodcourt for a drink but decided not to and went home instead. ah well. haven't had enough energy to do much recently...school's draining. and in a few hours we're going to face the full load. lab in the morning...hope i don't burn the place down. but lessons till 5:30pm tomorrow (or make that today) and then it's off to PS for e.guitar. i need to get my motivation soon...or else it's going to be so overwhelming (not that it isn't already...)