it's songs like this that kinda make me wish i hadn't gave up the trumpet after 2 weeks.
new MB20 song that i realise i like. it has this nice shiny feel to it because of the horns. =)

IT'S GONNA BE OVER SOON.

it's weird how before it was even asked, i know that it was coming.
i thought i would be able to answer definitely...but nope couldn't do it.
and this one question has been looping in my head the whole day.
but i don't know the answer to it. it's just a yes or no question.
but still...

anyway...approximately 72 hours to freedom.
oh and did i mention i played more guitar in the past 5 days than in the last 1 month.
it's holiday mood already.

well, i guess things can't always be bad. finally have a paper i think i can do decently. and there's this slight sense of relief. though i hope it's not a false sense of hope.

great...one last one to clear. one more week. one last break. and it's all over.

alright tomorrow's my second last paper. and so far, in all honesty, they have been pretty sucky except the single elective paper. i think i'm set to graduate with third class honours (and nothing less hopefully), because all hopes of pulling my GPA up is pretty much gone once i get anything less than a B+ for anything.

needless to say, it sucks...but what can i do? as i said, i'm so tired and my standard has dropped so much that i don't even know myself anymore. some thing's wrong but i can't seem to figure out what. now i'm just waiting for the last paper to go...then i'll have fun. lots of it.

Thu, Jun 01, 2006 -- Restricted Open Book - Examination Format

Please note that the examination format for the subject - MP3002/MP4102/M362D - Mechanics of Deformable Solids is “Restricted Open Book”

Restricted Open Book Examination - Duration 2hrs 30mins - One A4 size Cheat Sheet is allowed into the Examination Hall

Marks: Exam = 70%. CA = 30%

see, this is the announcement i copied from the online portal thing. it clearly states ONE A4 SIZE CHEAT SHEET -- NOT one stack. for a moment i thought i read wrongly.

and i was very shocked/stunned when the person next to me had 3-4 PIECES OF PAPER. what the hell? and no one stopped him or anything! i wanted to call the invigilator and ask him what was going on, but if that guy would get into trouble. and he would definitely not be happy with me.

yeah maybe i'm just bitter because i screwed it up so bad.
everyone wished me happy birthday, but i think my school wishes otherwise.

sigh...my standard of doing things has just dropped so badly, i don't know who i am anymore.


nevertheless, thanks to...
the few SNAV people, the 'level-bench' people, my NTU friends, NY friends, cousins, YM friends etc...who wished me happy birthday... special mention to uncle YH (i never wanted to call you that, but since you said so yourself) thanks man.

Broken - Lifehouse

The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time
I am here still waiting though i still have my doubts
I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain is there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on
I'm barely holdin' on to you

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead
I still see your reflection inside of my eyes
That are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
with a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain is there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on
I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm hangin' on another day
Just to see what you will throw my way
And I'm hangin' on to the words you say
You said that I will be ok

The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone
I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home

been watching a lot of criminal minds. it's like exams aren't just next week.

Hey posting from my handphone and seeing if this works. Anyway look at the messa crap on my table. Sigh..going to sleep now. My life's pretty screwed up..bleah.

"We need a hero, courageous sacrificing people, setting examples for all of us. Everybody loves a hero, people line up for 'em, cheer for them, scream their names, and years later tell how they stood in the rain for hours just to get a glimpse of the one who told them to HOLD ON a second longer. I believe theres a hero in all of us, that keeps us honest, gives us strength, makes us noble. And finally gets us to die with pride. Even though sometimes we have to be steady and give up the thing we want most, even our dreams."
--May Parker, Spider-man 2

ok if i get stuff right, i may be able to play cool funk stuff really soon.
it's weird how funky isn't cool while funk is.

but anyway...i have a ~100 bucks wah pedal and wanted to learn how to use it today. then DC brought his ~300 bucks wah pedal i guess so that in case i didn't bring mine he could still teach me. ended up doing an A/B test -- it's the first 'proper' one i've done with professional guidance. i.e. he did the playing and i just used my ears. and then later i had to try out...so i tried out with mine. kinda scared that if should the ~300 bucks cui3 i will not be able to afford compensation of any kind...well, that and...you know...other reasons. but then i was left without much choice when he asked me to try and see what's the difference.

the moment i settled the first strum with the first step...that was it. i am now officially tempted to blow ~300 bucks on a pedal. how sick is that...

so to jh and rosa here's the video i was talking about...
the 'uh oh' was the exact reaction i had when i strummed my first chord and produced the best sound i've ever done.



haha just watch the video and ignore my ramblings lah.

UPDATE: after reading the whole set of notes, i realise that 'running away' might just be a technical term that engineers really do use to describe the situation where the cylinder retracts prematurely. (i admit and recognize weird obsession towards this topic - what's new.)

i know it's very lame, but this just cracked me up...

"...here the valve creates a back pressure to prevent the load running away when the cylinder is retracting."

can literally see a mass block with 2 legs coming out and running away while the cylinder retracts. hmm must be getting sleepy or something.

my standard has dropped like siao. at this time last year i should be able to reach this speed (refer to the intro rift that continues into the song) without much problem but now, ARGH!!! speed 100 is like mad rush. can't even articulate properly. crap. lots of work to do after exams.

if the angriest i've ever got is rated 100, i am at 120 as of 1am today.
if you think i never meant it when i used to say i am about to murder people, i was. as of now, i am not.

i am pushed to the edge with exams 2 weeks away and nothing done, and a hell lot of screwed up shit that i seriously should not have to deal with considering that i have already done 99.9999% of the project which is supposed to be group work. i have no time to fuck around with you. all of you. please go slap yourself before i kill you. really. now you tell me you don't understand the mechanism? so tell me how do i keep my cool?

FUCK IT.