why did i choose to become a mechanical engineer?

currently feel at a totally lost. what am i doing? this isn't my first choice...where's my dream future? sigh. will i ever get to pursue my number one passion? at the rate i'm going, i'll definitely lose my motivation to do everything very soon.

i question where this all leads...and whether one day i will eventually return to what i like doing and whether one day i'll be able to make a living out of what i want to do. or will i be stuck and convinced to stay in the 'normal' cycle of how things go, whether i will give it up just for some 'stable', 'better-paying' job which was never what i set out to do, just because that's how the way things are.

i don't want to be a drifter, following the trends of society just because it will guarantee a great life, or any thing of that sort. now i'm neither here nor there, i don't know what to do, what i want to do...i'm losing my sense of direction. desperately need to fix stuff.